May, 5 2023
As we age, it's natural for our sexual desires to change and evolve. In my recent exploration of this topic, I've discovered that factors such as hormonal shifts, health issues, and emotional changes can all impact our libido. It's important to understand that these changes are normal and not something to be ashamed of. To manage these shifts, open communication with our partners, staying emotionally connected, and seeking medical advice when necessary can help maintain a fulfilling sex life. Remember, it's all about adapting and finding new ways to connect with your partner as you both continue to grow older together.
Sexual Desire: Causes, Practical Fixes, and When to Seek Help
Surprised by a drop in sexual desire? You're not alone. Loss of interest can come on slowly or suddenly, and it often has clear causes you can address. This page explains what usually affects desire, fast things you can try, and when to talk with a clinician.
What reduces sexual desire?
Think of desire as a mix of body, brain, and relationship. On the body side, hormones matter: low testosterone in men and hormonal changes in women can reduce interest. Chronic illness, pain, poor sleep, heavy drinking, and certain drugs can also blunt desire. For example, many antidepressants — especially SSRIs like citalopram (Celexa) — are known to lower libido or make orgasm harder.
Mental health and stress shape desire a lot. Anxiety, depression, and burn-out steal bandwidth you’d usually spend on sex. Relationship factors count too: unresolved conflict, low trust, or simple boredom can make the idea of intimacy feel unattractive.
Quick, practical fixes you can try
Start with basics that actually change hormones and mood. Improve sleep and aim for consistent bedtimes. Move more — regular exercise raises energy and can restore interest. Cut back on heavy drinking and nicotine; both blunt sexual response.
Talk with your partner. Honest, nonjudgmental chats about needs and timing can turn sex from a stress task into something enjoyable again. Try scheduling intimate time if spontaneous desire is rare — planning can reduce pressure and build anticipation.
If medications might be the issue, don’t stop them on your own. Make a plan with your prescriber. In some cases doctors switch antidepressants to options that cause fewer sexual side effects (bupropion is often discussed), or they add a low-risk strategy to reduce the impact.
Try small novelty changes: new activities together, shorter sessions focusing on touch, or sensual rather than goal-oriented sex. These shifts can rebuild desire without medical treatment.
Some people explore supplements. Evidence varies and safety matters, so check with your provider before trying anything new. If erectile issues are present, medications like Viagra address performance but not necessarily desire; discuss what you want to improve before choosing treatment.
When to see a doctor
See a clinician if the drop in desire is sudden, causes distress, or follows a medical event (surgery, new medication, hormone changes). Ask for a basic check: blood tests for hormones, review of medications, and a mental-health screen. A clear diagnosis opens clear steps — whether lifestyle changes, therapy, or medical treatment.
Small changes often help, and professional help can speed things up. If you want, check our related guides on medication effects, safe online pharmacies, and treating sexual dysfunction for more practical next steps.